Wednesday, February 18, 2009

No. 1 — Progress

Last night was a visit to the Walker public library. I picked out 4 random paperbacks from the romance section and started flipping through the pages. I recorded whatever caught my eye, which, for the most part, wasn't very exciting. There were a few gems, though, that made me laugh out loud (to the dismay of the old man who had taken a seat across from me). Here are the highlights:

"God's bowels! Where are you?"
A blowsy doxy flitted about in dishabille.
Her eyes brightened with the thrill of conspiracy. "Can I puke?"
There was no bed. "Where the devil is the bed?"

Some better than others, of course, but on the whole I'm pretty happy with these out of context. I needed a little help from the dictionary on the second one with all the archaic terms. Blowsy refers to various unbecoming aspects of a woman, namely untidiness and a red face. Doxy is another name for a prostitute. And finally (my fave), dishabille is the state of being scantily clad. Who knew I would be getting a vocabulary lesson out of this?

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